Jacob Graduates from sixth Grade

Friday morning Brad and I travelled to Stansbury Park to attend Jacobs's graduation exercises from Rose Spring Elementary.

Such sweet Friends

Glenda's Funeral

Glenda our Angel

Today my beautiful daughter Glenda Lee Nesbit passed away at the Logan Regional Hospital at 10:30 a.m.  I was blessed to sit with her along with many family members who love her dearly.  Mothers are suppose to make their children all better, give them a kiss and send them on their way.  I so wanted to make her all better but I just couldn't so I pled with my Heavenly Father to please bring her home and take away her suffering. A prayer not unfamiliar to me. This same plea went to Heaven from my lips for her father thirty five years ago. When you love someone so deeply you except their pain as yours so they may be free.  I think of the love my Savior has for me because he willingly suffered greater pain than I can begin to imagine to free me from my weaknesses.
Tonight my heart hurts so bad I think it should shatter into a million pieces.  But, tomorrow is a new day And I shall try my best to let the peace the Savior so freely offers enfold me and help me along.

I have so much I want to record of Glenda's last few days but for now I am spent. I want her back the same as I wanted her father back. I have lived with HOPE that all would be well.  Now my hope is gone. My tears are many.  Some of joy for her and some of anguish for me.   I know that my prayers sent to Heaven have been answered according to the Lord's eternal plan.  As President Kimball told me thirty five years ago. Keep your faith strong.  Go to your Father in Heaven for He knows you and He loves you.  He is very aware of your pain and he will help you to go on.

My sweet daughter. Rest is now yours. You did the work, you kept the faith and you are free.  I love you so much.

A Very Special Mother's Day

My Sweet Daughter Glenda

Today was hard. There is no other way to say it.  It stunk, it was horrible, it was sad, it was plain and simply not good. Glenda was taken to the ER this morning in severe pain. When I talked with her on Saturday she said the pain had gotten worse and Friday night and Saterday were bad. The pain medicine was only lasting about two hours. We talked about who she would go to for help. The nurse at the cancer center gave her the name of a doctor she really liked. Dr Ben Jacob was out ill but the clinic would see about getting something different. If nothing else she would go to the ER.
Saturday night it was growing worse. Early Sunday it was severe and she began throwing up.  Dan took her to the ER and they started a strong pain med. it began to help but the pain came so they gave her more. This gave some relief. They did a scan, blood work and drained about 500cc of fluid from her abdomen to relieve some pressure.  She has infection. The fluid was milky and stinky.  A Dr. Jones was the ER doctor.  They felt maybe she had an intestinal leak so a surgeon was called in.  Dr. Scott Anderson. Surgery would be about an hour and a half. In an hour he came out and sat down between Dan and Brad. The news was not good.

Larry and Bonnie enter the Mission Home

Today my brother Larry and his wife Bonnie entered the Mission Home in Provo.  They will be serving a fourteen month mission in the Farmington New Mexico Mission.  They will be such great missionaries.  They will give the Indians on the Zuni Reservation their best.

Easter Tradition

This year we asked the family to celebrate Easter with us on Saturday.  We would need to celebrate between eleven and three before Grandpa Brad needed to leave for his shift at the temple.  I had decided that this year we would have breakfast and indeed it was delicious.  I have such a great family that supports everything I do with 100 percent effort.  The food was delicious and the little ones were so excited and fun.

Feeding the Missionaries

Friday was a very busy day for grandpa and I.  After taking Glenda to her chemo sessions and doing a small amount of housework at her home we came home to prepare to feed the missionaries in our stake. 
I had prepared most everything on Thursday evening while Grandpa was substituting at the temple for brother Keene.  On Friday we would just have to set the table and grill the hamburgers.  (grandpa is really good at making a great hamburger)  We had invited Tonya, MacKenzie, Teresa and Paul to share our evening with us.  Tonya was the only one able to come.  We had a very nice evening together.  The Elders gave us a great mini lesson on faith and a crazy object lesson.
We sent them home with an Easter basket each and a large package of staples from Tonya. 

Then it was off to the Firth's to share in Lisa's fiftieth birthday celebration.  Tammy Earl and her family had decorated the yard and the house with lots of fun crazy 50 signs.  Fun night

Glenda's Last Chemo

Friday, April 18, 2014, was the last chemo session in this last series for Glenda.  She was ill when we picked her up, having not recovered well from the week before.  Our hearts are broken for her.  She has been through so much.  She expressed that this would be her last no matter what.  She said she has done her part of the work and now she is placing it in the hands of our Heavenly Father. The blessing that her Stake President gave to her is so true for her.  He blessed her body with the miracle of healing that will astound medical experts.  Our faith continues and our lives are filled with hope.

Clayton Get Together

Cancer is such a killer

This week has been a horrific one for Glenda.  The chemo is taking such a toll on her. 

Olivia Jane Dansie

April 8, 2014, is a very special day for the Dansie family.  Baby Olivia Jane came to join this special family.  She was born at 2:12 in the afternoon at the Ogden Regional Medical Center.  She weighed 7 pounds 11 ounces and was 19 inches long.  She looks just like her older sister Ellerie.  Grandmother Tonya said that Heavenly Father must have had twin girls for the Dansies but since he knew Kelsey could only handle one at a time He sent them seperately.  Dusty and Kelsey are wonderful parents and these little girls will be showered with great love and affection.  The extended family on both sides will also be great help and examples for them. 

Glenda gets blood transfusion

Amy traveled to Logan today to take Glenda for a blood transfusion. Glenda is very anemic and Dr. Ben Jacob said she needed this. The cancer and chemo are so hard on her body, let alone the great emotional toll.

Hunter starts Drivers Ed

Brewers airplane rode

The Brewer family flew to Arizona to spend a week with Grandma Zona.

Sid in Boston

Sid was in Boston fron Wednesday to Friday. Brad and I were able to be with the little ones for awhile on Thursday. They are so fun and special. Sammy loves to play with Grandpa and he is Lizzy's favorite. I had a special time helping Heather with her piano pieces. She has a recital coming up. I especially liked the Minuet by Bach. He is one of my favorite composers. Fun and challenging to play. She is doing very well. Maybe grandmas piano will have a home yet. Natalie is a wonderful mother. She gives so much for her family plus working her job. Proud of her.

Chemo Friday

Yesterday was the third chemo in this series for Glenda. She gets a week off and will then start another series of three. At the beginning of each series they do a CA125 blodd test. It was at 456. Hope it goes down more. Needs to get to 35 or below. Her blood test showed she is very anemic. Will have a transfusion on Tuesday. Hopefully thus will give her a boost. She is very weak. Cancer is the most hellis experience. I am only an observer and it kills me, I can't begin to fathom what she is experiencing. She is truly brave. In the end our prayer is that she will be healed from thus fictions desease

Maybe it is Spring

Today the winter wheat was fertilized.

Jacob Receives the Aaronic Priesthood

On Sunday March 16, 2014, Jacob Daniel Despain was ordained to the office of Deacon in the Aaronic Priesthood of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-daySaints by his father Danny.

Chemo Friday

Lots going on in the chemo room today.

Busy Week

Well I did it again. Decided to move the TV to the other side do the room. Had a special visit from Jeff and Lisa. He brought us a box of chocolates from his Belgium trip. Brad and I have found another fun series to watch on Netflix. Monarch of the Glen. Staying up way to late. But it is fun to be with him.

My Heart Breaks for Glenda

Yesterday Brad and I traveled to Logan to take Glenda to her chemo session. When we arrived she was so nervous and so not wanting to go. She was just starting to feel a little better and now she knew she would be feeling sick again. My heart is broken because I am helpless as her mother to FIX it for her. I would give my life for her if I could just make her all better. I do not believe I have experienced just extreme pain since her father died. Cancer is the most horrible disease. And in the end after all she is going through we can only hope she will be cured. As I she her husband suffering so greatly my memories of Dales illness and struggles are brought to my mind and how I longed and prayed for things to get better. I pled with my Heavenly Father to please not let him hurt anymore. I know that his death was the only way for husband pain to go away but would be the beginning of that empty painful place in my heart. Sometimes it seems so strange to think that

Quick trip

Today Brad and I drove to Idaho Falls to deliver a load of boxes and a back seat of cloths and stuff for Dennis and Sharron. They have moved from St. George back to Ammon, Idaho just west of Idaho Falls. Teri brought over a delicious meal that we all enjoyed and then it was back home. 10:30 to 5:30.

Pie

Brad left for his meetings and I stayed in bed an extra hour. Maybe all day but Dennis and Sharron picked me up at 10:30. Visited and had lunch. Brad came about two. We drove to his sisters and they drove us to a very very small town named Veyo for a piece of the famous pie. Way small down, hood pie.